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ya know...

... i don't have anything against alcohol or marijuana or other altering substances. not really.

i just know that for me, i don't want to use it as a *coping* mechanisms.

But getting drunk or high is best reserved for when i'm feeling good, not bad.

i'll leave pool and DDR and video games as being my coping mechanism. maybe the occasional beer. i feel like i have a pretty good handle on my alcoholic intake.

as for marijuana... i haven't smoked in many months. the time just doesn't feel right.

tv is so manipulative. sometimes i fucking hate it.

all of this emotional instability decreases my tolerance for people and increases my impatience. for the sake of everyone else and myself, i need to find my center again. And soon.

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