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flipping out.

yeah. i'm flipping out.

wednesday. that's when i'm calling her.

i hate feeling fragile.

*big sigh*

*shakes head* beh. fucking shit, man.

maybe i'll play some more iidx.

Comments

( read spoken (9) — speak )
edrake
Aug. 29th, 2004 11:22 pm (UTC)
fucking shit, man.
love-filled smooches to mendel.

;)
lifeofmendel
Aug. 29th, 2004 11:24 pm (UTC)
Re: fucking shit, man.
erica erica erica....

hiiiii.....
(Deleted comment)
lifeofmendel
Aug. 30th, 2004 07:54 am (UTC)
i disagree.

i owe it to myself and to her to call her. i said i would.

and even if i don't want to call her, i know i should. if i don't, i won't have the closure i need right now.

it'll be tough, but then it'll be over, and i'll be better eventually. there's no other way for me to look at it.

*shrug*
(Deleted comment)
lifeofmendel
Aug. 30th, 2004 12:38 pm (UTC)
*sigh*

that's not the closure i'm looking for, though.

i need more time. but i can't say goodbye to her forever.

she made a mistake. and it was a big one. and i'm forever affected by it. but she also did me a lot of good. she really did.

*shakes head* i don't know.

as for happy... i'm not going to search it out, you know? the moment i look too hard for it, it won't happen. i move slowly when it comes to emotions. i'll be happy overall eventually. right now, i'm content to just be periodically happy when i'm around my friends and generally unhappy because of what happened.

and... i can't not think of her either. i'm not *only* thinking of her like i used to, but i can't ignore her either.

beh. time for lunch.
(Deleted comment)
lifeofmendel
Aug. 30th, 2004 12:52 pm (UTC)
*smiles*

hugs are good.

*purrrrr*
(Deleted comment)
( read spoken (9) — speak )

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