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fooling everyone.

i always feel somewhat amused and ... ironic, maybe?... when people have a particular impression of me that is completely wrong.

Number one: I'm a nice guy, true... and one of the side effects of being a nice guy is that i come off as being "wholesome" or something. not the kind of guy who's particularly.... lustful or sexual or anything.

Sorry folks. 57% pure on the 1000 point purity test, and still looking to lower it. There might be some stuff i haven't done, but i'm a fucking pervert like everyone else. a nice pervert, but a pervert nonetheless. kinky too.

Number two: I talked with Kim Walker for about an hour today about life in general, and somewhere it came out that she thought i seemed like a pretty together, confident, and secure guy.

Sorry, Kim. I've gotten a lot better, but i'm still an incredibly insecure person that's suffered from low self-esteem issues all of my life. Confidence in myself always comes with a grain of salt, i think i suck at everything, etc. etc.

People think they know what i'm all about, and then they find out they're wrong. Then they adjust their thinking and *then* think they know what i'm all about, and then they find out they're wrong again.

Usually it's harmless, but sometimes it'll progress to a point where things just get fucked up. I've had some rare cases where people feel... betrayed to a degree that i'm not the person they thought i was.

i'm not sure if it's something i have the ability to control. It makes me feel like i should maybe be more of an asshole just as an experiment. then i bet i'd get laid. :)

Comments

( read spoken (6) — speak )
catbus
Jan. 15th, 2004 11:39 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I kinda thought you were the put together nice guy and blah blah blah..

I think this of lots of people til I read their lj's or something ;) But from what I know, I only like you more.


On the purity subject. Wtf. I seldom masturbate and yes people ask me "What's wrong with you?" Uh, sigh..? :'( lol
lifeofmendel
Jan. 15th, 2004 11:56 pm (UTC)
pfft.

nothing wrong with not masturbating.

do what you like. there are a lot of different walks of sexuality out there, and it's the variety that makes it cool.
platypi25
Jan. 16th, 2004 12:50 am (UTC)
Well, you've got me slightly beat...I am apparently 60% pure. That'll be good though, people call me a sick fuck, but I can say "Hey I'm only 40% a pervert"
specter_13
Jan. 16th, 2004 05:11 am (UTC)
I had a high score
I took that little test up there and I got a score of 88.7%. Yea I really haven't done much and the things I have done I am really proud of.
diskozombie
Jan. 16th, 2004 07:34 am (UTC)
Come on, give me some credit! *I* never thought you were wholesome! I know better ;)
lifeofmendel
Jan. 16th, 2004 08:50 am (UTC)
*laughs*
( read spoken (6) — speak )

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