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hate is a strong word.

murderoftwo recently wrote an entry about hate, and yeah, i've always prescribed to hate as being a strong word, reserved for those special occasions, those special people.

right now, i have to say that i hate watching japanime in english, but that's because it gets to be the scapegoat for all of the roller coaster emotions that's been flying around here in the past couple of weeks. and i'm just moody right now. maybe tomorrow the hate will settle back into the dislike that it normally is.

i don't know, though. Sometimes i wish i could really hate something that trivial so that it gets the brunt of those strong emotions as opposed to the two people (bordering on three) in the world that i hate. sometimes it seems like no one deserves that kind of emotion directed at them, no matter what.

Then, other times, i look at one of those people in particular... i think about what he's done, what he continues to do, his attitude, his demenaor, his aura... and i feel perfectly justified in giving him the full measure of my hatred. After eight long years, that hatred hasn't diminshed even a little, and i doubt that it ever will.

this would be more of a problem if i actually ever had to interact with him on a regular basis, but the chances of me ever coming in contact with him again is pretty slim, at least in my current life path. better that he be the object of all of that negativity rather than someone who is active in my life.

*sigh* okay. i feel better now. go journalistic therapy.


( read spoken (2) — speak )
Mar. 30th, 2004 06:51 am (UTC)
I used to think I hated someone. I used to think I hated a couple of people. I don't use the word lightly. To me, it means that given the opportunity to utterly and completely destroy the object of the 'hate' I would take it, regardless of the consequences.

now though, I don't think of them as more than mere pieces of a past best left behind. I've mellowed considerably. I won't give them enough of myself to 'hate' them anymore. They're not worth it.

Though I don't think there would be skid marks if they walked in front of my moving vehicle. But, that's very unlikely to happen.

Mar. 30th, 2004 10:39 am (UTC)
Re: ...
yeah, i'm one of the more mellow people i know. that's why it startles people when they discover that i have the hate that i do.

yeah... "utterly and completely destroy the object of the 'hate' regardless of the consequences" is pretty accurate to how i feel about the one guy. you don't even want to know what my Evil Plan is.
( read spoken (2) — speak )


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