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time passing

one of the effects of me working for Symantec was that time ended up going faster than my life as a student.

the reason for this was because of the quarter based system. Every three months, there was quarter end, and quarter end was a big deal. The last week was zero backlog, PTO blackout days, the last friday of the quarter was the day where i worked from 8am until 2am, first doing tech support for Order Operations before i moved to reporting and instead did a lot of frantic reporting and report support. Resultingly, the space that was filled in between was either a reflection of the quarter that had just passed or a preparation of the next coming quarter end, and there wasn't a lot in between. Even when individual days could be slow or non-moving, the bigger picture calendar was always moving.

thinking about the year in the span of three month benchmarks made months/seasons more important than individual days, and since those days, minutes, seconds didn't matter as much, the thing that we latched on to was months and quarters. And the quarters flew by as a result. Before i knew it, i had gone through four quarters, and it was only after i thought about it that i realized that was a year. When Year End came around the second time, it made me realize how fast it was all going, and all of it was a blur.

Other variables came to slow it down at times or speed it up. Being in my relationship with Katie sped things up, being in and out of contact with bre sometimes sped things up or slowed things down, discovering the local poker house slowed things down a lot because it made me sleep a lot less, &c. But overall, the overarching quarter system made those years of work speed through.

When i moved to New Orleans, the first year went by very quickly. I felt i had just moved down here and then suddenly i was done with my first marching band season, my first mardi gras, my first school year. Now i'm coming to the end of my second year here, and i've realized that time has slowed down again.

I mean, sure; the end of the second fall season was another step back moment in some ways because i still feel like i just moved down here and now suddenly i'm in the throes of my second year. But i was talking to Kate earlier about how she's almost been married for a year, about how i've almost been here for two years, and the words came out of my mouth about how fast it all seemed and when i thought about it afterwards i realized that that wasn't true.

First of all, the job here is split into much different benchmarks. You still have football season and mardi gras season and school year, but i think that as we as a staff are dealing with things on both a big picture and microscopic level, it's tempered the speed of time for me in a way that i didn't fully realize until today. Secondly, two years ago, April of 2008, i was still working at Symantec. It wasn't that long ago, and yet that feels like a past life. Living in Oregon feels like a past life. it feels like a decade ago, when a decade ago i had just moved out of pennsylvania. And that seems like an even further past life than who i am now.

I'm not sure what that means about my life now, about the direction that i've taken. i think that it's probably better overall; it says something about my lifestyle, elements both against my will and by choice, and how that results in a slower version of time passing which feels healthier.

maybe i'll feel differently about it a year from now. hopefully i will at least to some degree. if i feel the same as i do now, i'm definitely not doing something right.


Apr. 23rd, 2010 07:06 am (UTC)
When I read "&c", my life slows down!


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