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four vignettes

there's a female who's been working at the supermarket around the corner ever since i've moved here, a late 20s something blonde named Rebecca. she's not the sort of person that people would necessarily look at, but i think she's kind of cute and she's always seemed very nice. sometime about a year ago or so when i got my hair cut, she commented on it, saying she liked the cut.

tonight i stopped by the supermarket earlier this evening to grab some dinner supplies. i happened to check out with her again tonight, and she said, "it really doesn't take that long for your hair to grow back, does it?", and i said, "no, it really doesn't." i asked her if she liked it long or short, and she said she liked it long. then she said, "i'm leaving in two days." i asked her where she was going, and she said that she was moving to dallas to teach elementary school.

it kind of made my day. she's going to be a teacher. i bet she'd be a great one. a part of me had a tinge of regret that i never asked her out for a drink. it feels like it's too late now, but life has a lot of invisible missed opportunities, and the idea of having one that's there, while sad, is still a pretty wonderful thing.

it affected me a lot more deeply than i thought it would, and it made me decide to go back there tomorrow with a card for her. and if she happens to be there, it will be a parting gesture that i bet she'd like. if she's not, then that's just unfortunate timing, except that it's not because at least we got that much.


when i was at jazz fest and saw pearl jam, mark, amanda, and i were set up in a place where there was a lot of people traffic moving right in front of us. it bothered mark and amanda a whole lot because they hated the traffic and they tried to convince me to block the flow, but i actually really liked it and started taking pictures of all of the people going by on my iPhone. i think i took about 400 stealthy pictures, and i was planning on putting them up on facebook when i got the chance.

on saturday i went canoeing for the first time ever, and i decided to bring my iPhone with me so i could take some pictures. i got some great pictures, and after a while i put the phone in the plastic baggie and in my lapel pocket. apparently i didn't seal it properly; the phone got wet, and it didn't turn back on. last time when i had to get my phone replaced, they put the SIM card into the new phone and i didn't lose anything. This time, even though they gave me the same SIM card, i went in there and discovered that all of those photos were lost. It made me sad, but the memory is still there, the concept will still live in my head; capturing pictures of passing strangers as they pass by me, being arseholes, being wonderful, being humans, being everything about life that i love and exist for. i'm sure at some point i'll have a similar opportunity to snap a shit ton of pictures. hopefully that time around i won't procrastinate about uploading them to my phone. or at least the next time i go canoeing, i'll leave my phones in the car.


sometime almost a year or so ago now, this hispanic guy and his girlfriend moved into one of the apartments next to mine, an apartment above one where a single older woman, Lou, who's quiet but nice is living. When the guy was first unloading stuff last year, he rubbed me the wrong way because at one point he casually threw a bottle towards one of the homeless cats that Lou puts food out for, scaring it off. He was friendly enough to me, but then sometime a couple of months ago, Lou reported to the neighborhood regulars (mark, amanda, me, Mr. Shaw, a few others) that when she was coming home late from work one night, the neighbor who was very wasted assaulted her and kissed her against her will. she was able to knee him or something and then get into her apartment, and he kept on pounding on her door and telling her to let him in, a bunch of shit like that.

it came out then from Lou that she could always hear them fighting and hear him beating her. she bought pepper spray. she started considering moving out since it seemed like the landlord wasn't going to take immediate action, but then a few weeks later, it came out that the couple's lease wasn't getting renewed and they were getting the boot in june.

as i was coming back from a late night of cards a few days ago, i saw a lot of stuff piled in front of the apartment door in a chaotic mess. it looked like someone had gotten kicked out. later that day, Mr. Shaw said that the guy had hit his girlfriend in the face pretty badly (again) and that something about this time around broke something in their relationship and she kicked him out. The stuff was gone the next day, but then more stuff showed up the day after, yesterday. Mr. Shaw said that the guy was supposed to be back at 5pm to pick the stuff up, and that was that. I don't think he ever showed up; the stuff was still there when i left this morning and also when i got home earlier this evening. As i was pulling up, i saw someone stooped over by some of the stuff, and i thought, "fuck, it's him." i didn't want to see his face or pretend to be neighborly about the whole situation. But when i parked and the guy stood, it wasn't him; it was a poacher, looting through the stuff to find something to take away. He took a bunch of stuff and walked away, and i didn't stop him. before i went into my apartment, i saw a couple of nice pillows and i thought about taking them, but it was only a fleeting thought; i don't want any of that shit in my apartment. it all needs to go so his presence can leave my street.


it's coming up on september a lot sooner than i would have expected, especially given my recent entry in which time feels much slower than it used to be. That's to be expected though; time can be slow and fast at the same time. i've been thinking about it a lot lately, about where things were a year ago versus now in my life, and the sort of direction that it could potentially take in the future, and i arrived at a few decisions that i didn't think i would. nothing final, understand; it's all only now moving and taking shape, the idea of moving towards a different sort of mentality, a new sort of mentality than where it is that i was before, ever moving forward, ever changing. But the ideas still have to grow, and the time still needs to pass, not just for my sake. When it all comes around again, we'll see where the new paths show. whatever it is, so long as i know that it's moving forward, that life continues to move forward, it can only be fantastic or better. i'm hoping for better, but fantastic will do just fine.


( read spoken (3) — speak )
May. 18th, 2010 02:14 am (UTC)
abusive relationship
well i was in one and i hate the damage its caused,but then i have people like e and am glad i can trust again,nobody talks about how it destroys you, but it does and i hope she walks away forever i wish idid
May. 18th, 2010 02:17 am (UTC)
Re: abusive relationship
i've seen the sort of damage it can cause more than once. and yeah, i fucking hate it. i'm glad she finally stood up against it and kicked him out. hopefully she'll start to be able to heal.
(Deleted comment)
( read spoken (3) — speak )


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March 2017